Happy March 14th

Most Women have kept this a secret holiday from their men. As most women have their day of spoils on Valentine's Day. February 14th. Where men slave over making this day extra special by catering to their emotional desires...

Attention...

Gifts and jewelry...

Emotional expression...

There is a little known holiday of March 14th. The male version of Valentine's Day.

On this day, women are to do that little extra somen' somen' for their man. Or in some cases, the butch-ier counterpart in "alternative life-styles". (not that there's anything wrong with that.)

What makes men happier than March 14th (Superbowl excluded)? it's Steak and "Service" Day. Feed me baby! It's a pleasure most men will not experience because of the conspiracy to hush this holiday into extinction.

Dateline: Bharatpur, India 2003

A housewife removed the date from every calendar on her husband's sources of information keeping. This prevented the holiday from occurring in this little household, but Karma from the gods stepped in and March 14th was the day she will never try to erase again.

The husband, in frantic loss of time and space continuum, thought it was March 13th again, a Friday, and out of superstitious prevention, avoided walking under a ladder, detoured into the street and lost his leg in a freak accident where a Taco truck and a Hot Dog stand collided. Irony? Or fate?

Dateline: Moscow, Russia 2004

A girlfriend decided to lie about the holiday and add a twist that she would serve her man a chicken breast (we men hate white meat) and then, cruelly explain she had a headache so had to go to bed early.

As her boyfriend ate, he found a wishbone. Made a wish to "be with his GF tonight" and as he broke it himself (and the wishbone rules strictly state you aren't supposed to break it alone, or else!) he broke the wishbone, slipped out of control and his right hand smashed against the candles on the table. His hand caught on fire because of the chicken grease, and he tried to put it out with his left hand and burned that too. Today, both his hands are burnt and he not only missed service from his girl, he can't even service himself. The horror!

So bottom line, share this holiday! Enjoy your steak men! Ladies, embrace the holiday the gods have bestowed upon these good men and do yourselves and each other a favor! March 14th, Steak and Service Day. Live it, love it, learn it.